Long time no talk. I told yins I am not good at this blogging thing, but here I am! Don’t be mad, I need to let you in on an upsetting truth.
There is no such thing as a wedding without stress.
Sorry, Charlie. Some weddings have more stress inducing factors than others, but there is nothing you can do to completely rid your wedding day of all the stress. Think about it. Your wedding day is the biggest day of your life (NBD), you need to accept the fact that nerves induce stress and that’s the way the cookie crumbles. However, there are a few ways that can help significantly reduce the amount of stress leading up to and the day of. Read below for some tips and tricks (and let your mind be blown, lol jk).
- Staying organized and ahead of the game. Like, duh. Organization is the key to life. Have a wedding folder on your computer containing all vendor contracts, payment paid dates, wedding inspo, budget info, and everything else wedding related. Keep a binder of all the important for easy access (also, I am a hands on kind of gal so I love having info at my fingertips). If you don’t already use a weekly/daily planner, now is your time to head to Target to get one. Remind yourself of upcoming payments, when you have to have your song list finalized by, when final guest count for catering is due, basically everything ok. Turn your email notifications on. Set an alarm on your phone everyday to remind you to check your email if you have too much junk mail to turn your notifications on (lolz, totes me). Don’t think because you have a wedding planning timeline off of Pinterest that you have to follow it exactly. If you get things done in advance, KEEP MOVING ON and taking care of additional items to keep checking that list off. DIY- do not, I repeat, do friggin’ not, wait until the last minute to do those DIY projects. Make time weekly or monthly to do a little at a time. Waiting ’til the last minute = stressed bride, rushed designs, and hello, stress pimples. No thx. When the week of your wedding comes, everything should be completely accomplished, minus decorating of course. Everyone thinks the week leading up to your wedding is the most stressful, but that isn’t the case when you have me as your planner (fyi). I want you to enjoy spending time with all of your family and friends in one place, especially with those who spent a lot of time and money to be there for your big day. BE AHEAD OF THE GAME SO THIS CAN HAPPEN.
- Carefully select your vendors. Sure, Joe is offering a $500 DJ special, but he is difficult to get ahold of, you have to rent his equipment for him, and is very unorganized. You truly get what you pay for. It is worth paying a lot more for a reliable DJ, one that is on top of their game with communication, has everything they need ready to roll, and doesn’t need to be micromanaged to make announcements and follow the timeline. (Side note: I have worked with a ton of amazing DJ’s, but this was the best example my coffee-deprived brain could think of). I understand that not everyone has $50,000 to spend on a wedding, but you are better off paying a little extra for real professionals that are worth the investment. One thing I tell all of my couples is that if you are inquiring about a vendors’ services and they take forever to respond, it will not get better after that contract is signed. You are literally offering them thousands of your hard earned dollars, communication does not get better after paying that retainer. You need to invest in vendors who are genuinely excited about your wedding day, not just another paycheck. Those are the vendors that will go out of their way for you on the wedding day. Like me. I am the self proclaimed president of the not yet created “I Give A Shit Committee”.
- Delegate wedding responsibilities. I get it, you worked tirelessly on your designs and vision for 12+ months, so you don’t want anyone to screw it up for you. Understandable. Break up responsibilities across trustworthy bridesmaids, groomsmen, and family members to keep everyone involved and time for you to chill. Make sure everyone has a copy of that day of timeline, type up responsibilities for each person for setup and the day of, and take a step back to oversee. You worked for four weeks on the perfect seating chart, let one of your bridesmaids set it up and put the names out. Have your dad be the one to pick up the alcohol and soft drinks if it is not being delivered. Put your maid of honor in charge of wedding day lunch and bottomless mimosas. Put those big tough groomsmen in charge of the heavy lifting. If you try to control everything, it ain’t gonna work, sis. Accept the fact that you must trust those around you to carry out what you worked so hard on.
- Hire a wedding planner. Bet you didn’t see this one coming 🙂 hehe. I can’t even begin to tell you things that I have handled and taken care of my clients’ wedding days and even leading up to the wedding. No matter how prepared and organized you are, you can’t prepare for the unexpected. It is as simple as that. A day of coordinator truly allows for the couple, bridal party, and immediate family a day of relaxation and enjoyment. We handle situations and problems that you would never even find out about. Those final details before the wedding aren’t just to remind vendors about your wedding. Those are crucial emails, where the smallest typo is misunderstanding can have HUGE effects on the wedding day. We handle the decorating, managing other vendors, and keeping us on track. We keep your glasses full of your drink of choice. We are the information center for your guests. We pack your gifts in your getaway car and pack your decorations back up for an easy exit after the wedding. We make sure all the vendors clean up after themselves at the end of the night, making sure you get that security deposit back. That is day of coordination in a short little nutshell. Still think a wedding planner may not be an essential part of a stressless wedding? The following are situations that I have encountered in the past month or so. How would you prepare and handle the following situations?
- The ring bearer pillow was left at home, and wasn’t realized until 10 minutes before the ceremony.
- The staffing company doesn’t show up to a 250 person wedding (despite the contract mandating one being present), and the Chef only brings one assistant with him to setup the buffet and leave immediately after.
- The lights at the ceremony site (aka the reason you booked the ceremony was because of those trees and those lights) stop working right before the ceremony begins.
- It begins to downpour an hour before an outdoor ceremony starts.
- The caterer, who was in charge of bringing all of your rentals, arrives 45 minutes before the wedding, without the tablecloths, linens, dishes, glasses, and cutlery.
The engagement period is the most exciting time in your life. Trust me when I say that post-wedding blues are a real thing. You and your fiance deserve to enjoy this fun time, build that foundation for a kickass marriage, and pop the bubbly every single day with your family and friends. While your wedding day is the biggest day of your life, it doesn’t need to be the most stressful. Hopefully you learned a few ways to make this process easier for you. I would love to chit chat with ya about what has been difficult during your planning, and be there on the wedding day to handle everything for you. I go above and beyond for my couples and I wanna do the same for you, PUHLEASE.
Talk to you soon!